Sunday, April 13, 2008

Rough Draft 2

There I was sitting in my room thinking how glad I was to have my cats back to normal. I went through a wild ride with my cats but it turned out to be okay.

“Meow” That is the sound my cat made all the way to the vets. Today was the day that my cats got spayed and neutered. We walked into the door and checked in at the front desk. We walked into the room and the vet said, “You need to leave your cats here awhile so we can get them ready, come back in one day” she said in a sweet voice. We drove home and I was sitting there thinking how quiet it was without the cats around in the car meowing. At home everything was different we could leave our bedroom doors open and no one hopped up on our laps at dinner. When our cats were kittens they would always beg for food at the table. So we made up the blue plate system. Every time we took those blue plates off the fridge they knew they were going to get some food. At dinner I felt awkward sitting there without the constant meows for food.

The next day when we picked the cats up and they had cones on. Man they look weird I’ve never seen an animal with a cone on. We took them home and the meows were back as we drove back home. Our vet told us to keep them in separate rooms and Katie had to go in a cage.
A few weeks later Rowdie was let out of his cage he was all healed and I thought man it’s only a matter of time before Katie is let out of her cage. In that time that Katie was in her cage I started to get more connected with her. When the time came to let her out of her cage we noticed that her stomach was way too big. We took her to the vet and they said that Katie had a fluid leak in her chest. They said they would have to drain the fluid every couple of days for awhile and we would have to put her back in her cage. Again I was sitting in my room thinking about how hard it must be to sit in that cage all day. I thought how lonely it must be. I freaked out and with that thought I spent every day with Katie until she was well. Day by day Katie and I grew a stronger relationship with each other. In order to keep me entertained in the room she was in, I turned on my TV which is also in there.

When we were able to let her out of the cage to let here roam around the room we had to change things up. She still had her cone on so she could easily trip or get stuck. Plus we had to make sure that she didn't jump or run so we had to slant things so she could climb. We also needed one person to be in the room when she is out. That person was me. It was not because I was forced to it was because I wanted to. The reason was because I became so attached to her I didn't want to leave her. When the time came that Katie could be let out of the room she still had to keep her cone on. We had to keep a constant watch on her so she couldn't jump, run, or get pounced on by her brother. We also had to make sure she could eat and drink. But the worst part was the cat litter would get stuck on her cone and we had to wipe it off. The day the vet told us we could let her out of her cage. I jumped up and started running around the room. After that I felt kind of embarrassed since I ran around in the middle of the waiting room. Luckily no one was there but us.

After all that hard work we did to keep her safe it paid off. She was in that cone for a month and a week after Christmas we could take it off. The day we took the cone off I noticed how soft her fur was since I couldn’t pet her for a month. Katie Is my best friend and she's now back to her old spazzy self thanks to her bothers constant pouncing. I still love Katie even after all that and I never won't.

4 comments:

Julia B. said...

its really good john. i liked the style. i really got the tone of how much you loved your cat. I like the sentence variety. I would be proud of the intro. watch ur spelling.

Mr. Talner said...

lets talk about verb tense. i have an idea for you. come and see me. this seems a bit long. what is your focus? are there any parts to cut? try to add more sensory description too.

Aubrey N said...

Jon,
You did a good job. I like how you started your paragraph off with onomatopoeia. I also enjoyed how you told what you missed about them instead of you missed them.
"In order to keep me entertained in the room she was in, I turned on my TV which is also in there." This sentence was slightly confusing so you might want to re look at it.

Anonymous said...

You did a great job. You used the different methods.Sentence variety dialogue,flashback. You made some sentences longer and some shorter and that was great. One thing I might work one is you have some spelling errors. Throghout it you did a great job and you should be proud.